The referee:

The announcer:

***

Boomerang Brother: Ok, what gives? I've been waiting for nine days since the match was supposed to begin, and Hammer Brother hasn't shown up. I demand he forfeit!

Roy: Make like Pokey or I'll cream you!

Pokey: ...

Boomerang Brother: That's well and good, but the last time you tried to cream me you hurt your hand on my helmet and shrieked like a girlie. And also that didn't defeat me.

Roy: ... Why you!

Meanwhile...

Miyamoto: Sorry for taking so long. There was a long line ahead of you. We started with those characters who appeared at the beginning of the game, you know.

Miyamoto hands Hammer Brother a check.

Hammer Brother: No problem, it was worth it to wait in order to get another game appearance. Your games are always great.

Miyamoto: Well thank you!

Hammer Brother: Yup, really great. In fact, nearly perfect! Hey, you know what would make the games really perfect? ... I should star!

Miyamoto: ... Next.

Bootler: 'Bout time!

Twenty minutes later...

Pokey: Welcome to Roy's Boxing Arena. The Boxing Administration, or Roy, would like to thank you for your patience over the past nine days.

Tubba Blubba: Wah! Let me outta here!

Tubba Blubba's Heart: Let me outta here and here!

Pokey: Right. This week we have what appears to be a slug fest. In the blue corner, please welcome Hammer Brother.

Hammer Brother: Bow to me! I'm a star!

Pokey: And now, please give a round of applause for our returning champion in the red corner, Boomerang Brother.

Boomerang Brother: Grr... you're all gonna wish you forfeited!

Roy: Whuh? Oh! Battle time! Ok, go ahead and fight!

Pokey: Boomerang Brother starts it off by throwing... would you guess it, a boomerang. Hammer Brother throws a hammer and the two collide and fall to the floor of the ring. But here comes a second boomerang... well, Hammer Brother blocks it with his helmet. Now the two are charging each other... um... and now they're both sitting dazed in the middle of the ring.

Roy: Ha! Get up before I count to ten or I win! One, two-

Pokey: Boomerang Brother and Hammer Brother have jumped to their feet, causing some sort of bump to flow from the center of the ring to the outside. Hammer Brother is now trying to pound the ground, but Boomerang Brother does not seem to care. He sure is throwing a lot of boomerangs, but they're all either bouncing off of his opponent's hemlet or off of Roy, the former of which doesn't care.

Roy: Ow! Hey! Watch it or get disqualified!

Boomerang Brother: Me?!

Pokey: Hammer Brother has started another charge, and now he's throwing hammers too. Wow. Um... but the spiked-tipped hammers seem to have cracked Boomerang Brother's helmet.

Boomerang Brother: Hey! That... that's my souvenir from Mario 3!

Hammer Brother: Well nyeh to you! My helmet's from Paper Mario!

Boomerang Brother: No fair! Wah! I quit!

Roy: (happily) The match goes to the real champion, Hammer Brother!

Pokey: End of chapter... er, battle.

Roy: Who will you battle next week, Hammer Bro.?

Hammer Brother: I want to battle Buzzy Beetle. I dunno, it came to me in a dream sometime.

Roy: Or in a voter's comment. Hey Pokey, what's with all the talking?

Pokey: I was speaking to Kamek earlier.

Roy: ... DAD help us.

The winner:

The loser:

Now you have a choice:
You can go back and memorize the rest of the battles.
You can go back to the boxing arena, because I know you loved it so much!
Anyone who rats about the conditions here will be personally pounded by me! If you'd like a pounding, you can also go back to Lemmy's Land.