The referee:

The announcer:

***

Hammer Brother: You know, I figured out why I chose Buzzy Beetle. He can't throw stuff like I can, so it's sure to be an easy battle.

Roy: No argument there. Right Pokey?

Pokey: Right.

Roy: I sure am glad I got him deprogrammed from Kamek.

Hammer Brother: No, but really look at him! Pft, he can't even talk! He gets a good rap just because he can withstand fireballs. But when you get right down to it, he may as well be a Koopa Troopa. He's just got a fancy shell.

Roy: On that note, let's go to our resident analyst, Larry. Larry, who do you think will win?

Larry: I'm going with Hammer Brother today, on the grounds that if Hammer Brother loses you will probably defeat Buzzy Beetle yourself.

Roy: Pokey?

Pokey: Clap for challenger Buzzy Beetle. Cheer for champion Hammer Brother.

Hammer Brother: I think I liked him better last week.

Roy: Shut up! You're holding up everything! Now, today I'm going to call on a special fan to start the match. Will whoever is in seat XW27 come down to the ring?

Three hours later, Koopa Koot reaches the ring.

Koopa Koot: All right sonny, I made it. Do I get a coin for doing you a favor this time?

Roy: Nope, even better! Go to the center of the ring and start the match.

Koopa Koot: Well ok, but I'm not as good at starting fights as I used to be.

Koopa Koot hobbles to the center of the arena.

Koopa Koot: Ah... zzz...

Pokey: The match begins. Hammer Brother throws a hammer and knocks out Koopa Koot. Buzzy Beetle pokes its head out, then withdraws to defend against another hammer. Hammer Brother storms and hurls Buzzy Beetle... no damage. Buzzy Beetle pokes out its head. Hammer Brother slams the ground... Buzzy Beetle doesn't care about the flame ring.

Roy: Hm, but it's good for making marshmallows! Hm? Hey! Toast the marshmallow, not me!

Pokey: Hammer Brother is sitting on the ground and making a wailing sound. Buzzy Beetle is uneffected. Actually... Buzzy Beetle is just puliing its head in and out of its shell every few seconds. And... here comes Roy.

Roy: I say Hammer Brother wins, because Buzzy Beetle is apparently unable to battle.

Pokey: Hammer Brother wins.

Hammer Brother: Yow! Eh? Oh, I win? Yay!

Koopa Koot: Zzz... let the match begin!

Roy: Hammer Brother... next week?

Hammer Brother: Ah yes. Um... I'm not listening to the voice in my head this time. I'm just going to battle a Goomba.

Roy: ... Ok. Ya know, that's really sorta smart.

Hammer Brother: Yup.

The winner:

The loser:

Now you have a choice:
You can go back and memorize the rest of the battles.
You can go back to the boxing arena, because I know you loved it so much!
Anyone who rats about the conditions here will be personally pounded by me! If you'd like a pounding, you can also go back to Lemmy's Land.