|
The all-powerful Roy Koopa: My moves are perfect, there is no way I could get hurt, let alone lose! |
Baseball Boy: He just can't play ball with the big boys, namely me. |
|
Ludwig von Koopa: Oh come on now! You must be joking if you say he'll win! |
Birdo: She's a wimp! Haha! A wimp! No problem for me! |
The referee:

The announcers:
and ![]()
***
Baseball Boy: ... Now, if you hold the ball like this, you can throw a-
Roy: Shut up! We're on, look mad!
Ludwig: I shall incinerate you!
Baseball Boy: Not until I whif you!
Birdo: ... Guys.
Roy: Welcome to the Arena, for an incredible match in which I will win! I now turn the floor over to our announcers today, Kamek and Pokey.
Kamek: Thank you, it's an honor!
Pokey: Hi.
Kamek: Today we have an incredible match in store for you.
Pokey: There are four fighters.
Kamek: ... Let's introduce them! In the Red Corner, he's the first one to reach this round, the All-Mighty Roy Koopa!
Roy: That's all-powerful, but you were right about the rest. I'll be the first to reach the next round too!
Pokey: Here's Baseball Boy.
Baseball Boy: I've been practicing in the off-season, and my arm's never been better!
Kamek: He's smarter than Einstein, and he's in the Yellow Corner. Give it up for Ludwig von Koopa!
Ludwig: I calculate that I can not be defeated.
Pokey: Birdo is last.
Birdo: Last is the best, and third is the one with hair on the chest!
Ludwig: Hey!
Kamek: Our referree tonight is... Roy?
Roy: Yeah! And anyone who has a problem with that can speak to A and B!
Kamek: Who are A and B?
Roy raises his fists.
Kamek: Ah.
Pokey: Let's go to Larry.
Larry: Well, everyone laughed at me when I guessed Birdo last week, but I was right and I saved Kolorado, so who's laughing now?
Kamek: Actually, no one's laughing, and Kolorado got zapped anyway.
Larry: Yeah, but... shut up! Now tonight, I expect that Roy will win. He is the strongest of the four out there, plus his being the referree has got to give him an advantage.
Pokey: Maybe.
Kamek: Well put Larry! Our spectator in danger tonight is... Valentina!
Valentina: Huh? Well of all the rude things!
Luigi: Ouch! My ears!
Valentina: Oh! You!
Pokey: It's time to fight.
Roy: Yes, it is. Ok, we start on my mark.
Baseball Boy: Is this gonna be a fair fight? Because otherwise I'll use spitballs.
Birdo: Eww!
Roy: Oh, it wil be a fair fight, alRIGHT!
Kamek: Roy abrubtly dashes out of his corner and smashes his full weight towards the Green Corner. Baseball Boy is blasted out of the ring!
Pokey: Is that allowed?
Kamek: I have no idea, but that speed blur was a really incredible orange.
Birdo: You cheated!
Roy: Yeah, and?
Ludwig: You have gone too far, Roy! Just because you own this place doesn't mean you can cheat.
Roy: Oh, I'm sorry, I'll fight fair... not!
Pokey: Roy charges Ludwig and is blocked.
Kamek: That's right, because Ludwig is massive enough to absorb Roy's charge. The two brothers are in the middle of the ring fighting for ground.
Roy: You... will... fall!
Ludwig: I can sustain myself as long as you can.
Pokey: Birdo is away from the fray.
Kamek: And so not much action seems to be happening. What the?! Roy suddenly jumped back from Ludwig!
Pokey: Ludwig fell to the floor.
Kamek: Roy slammed the ground and sent Ludwig outta there!
Roy: Cianara! That was easy enough.
Birdo: Floosh!
Roy: Ow! I'm on fire! I'm burning! Owhoyeow!
Pokey: Haha! Birdo flamed Roy.
Kamek: This could be it! I don't see any water for Roy to douse himself in!
Pokey: It's over.
Roy has bounced out of the ring and is disintegrating. But before he is gone, he lands on a certain button...
Valentina: Blagadiblagadiblagadiblagadiblagadiblagadiblag! End transmission!
The winner:

The losers:

Now you have a choice:
You can go back and memorize the rest
of the battles.
You can go back to the boxing
arena, because I know you loved it so much!
Anyone who rats about the conditions
here will be personally pounded by me! If you'd like a pounding, you can
also go back to Lemmy's
Land.