The referee:

The announcer:

The interpreter:

***

Roy: Let's get started already!

Ludwig: I'm afraid Jelectro is having a power surge.

Roy: Well you're the genius, fix him!

Ludwig: It will take me a little time...

Roy: Fine, you have until Larry makes his prediction and I announce the Tourist of the Week. Ok?

Ludwig: Um, well-

Roy: Good! Punching Bag!

Larry: ... The name's Larry.

Roy: Prediction, Punching Bag?

Larry: Grr... Well Roy, I've been a bit off lately, but this time it's a surewin. Beezo will win for sure, since he is airborne and the only attack Shy Guy has is bump. Pretty sad if you ask me. Even you could beat him.

Roy: Hm... what?!

Larry: Nothing. Just Beezo.

Roy: Well, ok. Now I'll announce the Tourist of the Week, the one who really cares if Larry is right. Envelope please!

Roy snaps his fingers and the envelope appears in his hand.

Roy: Thank you, Lemmy. Now, will Husky/Washu or Max Jones win again? Will they?!

Washu: It'd be nice.

Husky: Bacon bacon bacon bacon!

Max Jones: What? When did I ever win?

Roy: ... You have the weirdest tourists, Lemmy. Anyway, this week's Tourist of the Week is... Lil Cheep Cheep?!

Lil Cheep Cheep: Hey! That's me!

Skippy: Yoink!

Lil Cheep Cheep: AH! My goggles! Don't look!

Roy: ... Okay... Well Ludwig, is Jelectro fixed yet?

Ludwig: I'm not sure yet, can I-

Roy: JELECTRO! NARRATE!

Ludwig: Oh, I hope this works...

Jelectro: 

Everyone: ...

Ludwig: Uh... one more minor adjustment.

...

Ludwig: Ok, now try again.

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: It worked! Uh, welcome back to the Arena for another rousing battle! I'm Jelectro, your announcer... and I'm Ludwig, your interpreter.

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: Let's get right to the competitors! Taking up space in the Blue Corner is the challenger, Shy Guy, who is weak to just about everything.

Shy Guy: Not true! Just vegetables.

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: How pathetic. The Champion this week for his first time is Beezo, who is blending into the Red Corner. How he became champion is a mystery to me.

Beezo: I'm a winner, that's why!

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: Whatever. Koopa Troopa, please start the battle.

Koopa Troopa: I don't want to. This random tourist will.

Richard: Why me?

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: Ok then Richard, start the battle!

Richard: Ok. Uh... fight?

Beezo: With pleasure!

Shy Guy: Me first!

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: And there they go! Well Beezo throws a spear right away and it lodges in Shy Guy's back! This could be it right now!

Beezo: Victory is mine!

Shy Guy: No way! Look, no damage!

Beezo: What?

Shy Guy: Here I come!

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: It won't be over that quickly after all. Shy Guy is running really fast, but Beezo is just laughing at him because he is flying up way high off the floor.

Shy Guy: I fail to see the humor of the situation.

Beezo: Have you seen a mirror by any chance? Man, I hope someone is taping this.

Shy Guy: I'll make you change your tune!

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: Shy Guy is continuing to pick up speed, now he is bouncing off the ropes too. Hey... I think he has a plan!

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: His bouncing is causing him to get off the ground! I don't think Beezo has noticed! No, he's still laughing and Shy Guy is getting higher. This could be trouble...

Shy Guy: Take this!

BLAM!!!

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: OW! Shy Guy got high enough off the floor to plow into Beezo at a high speed! He drove the end of the spear right into him! Beezo was taken completely off guard and has fallen to the floor. Let's see if Koopa Troopa... I mean, Richard, has anything to say.

Richard: Um... looks dead enough to me.

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: Then that's it! Though he is a little weakling, Shy Guy has won the battle!

Shy Guy: Let me go up there and take care of you!

Jelectro: Bzz!

Ludwig: This is Jelectro, for Roy's Battle Arena, signing off. Good night!

Lil Cheep Cheep: Who won? I've been covering my eyes the whole time.

Roy: Not Beezo!

Lil Cheep Cheep: Uh oh... now Roy, please don't- blagadiblagadiblagadiblagadiAAG!!! End transmission!

The winner:

The loser:

Now you have a choice:
You can go back and memorize the rest of the battles.
You can go back to the boxing arena, because I know you loved it so much!
Anyone who rats about the conditions here will be personally pounded by me! If you'd like a pounding, you can also go back to Lemmy's Land.