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Roy: Look at me! How could anyone even think of beating me? |
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Culex: Let's just see how he does, without his precious crystals! |
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Roy: Look at me! How could anyone even think of beating me? |
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Culex: Let's just see how he does, without his precious crystals! |
The referee:
The announcer:
***
Kamek: Welcome back to the Sports Hall! For tonight's special battle, you get a special announcer! ... Well actually, it was after Baby Bowser's bedtime. And, when I'm the announcer, you know the refereee will be-
Audience: POKEY! POKEY! POKEY!
Pokey: Hi.
Kamek: Er... right. And, of course you all know who I am.
Audience: ...
Kamek: Oh come on! Surely you know I'm Kamek!
Pokey: I'm Pokey.
Audience: POKEY! POKEY! POKEY!
Kamek: Ooh... Oh, forget this, let's just get to the battle already. In the Red Corner, it's the invinvincble, invulnerable, all-powerful, unstoppable, never lost a battle Roy Koopa! And he's good-looking too.
Roy: I'm ready! Bring it on!
Kamek: In the Blue Corner, it's Culex.
Culex: I am matter, I am-
Roy: Shut up! We'll never get started!
Culex: Well, I do control time...
Roy: Shut up!
Kamek: Well Larry, what do you say? Tough match, right?
Larry: What, are you kidding? Roy's gonna get creamed! With Culex's five crystals, it's basically a five-on-one match. Even if Culex didn't have his crystals, he has so much HP, I'm sure he could knock out Roy before going down himself. Really, it's no contest.
Kamek: And Larry has spoken! Since Roy is in the ring, he gave the Tourist of the Week envelope to the referee-
Audience: POKEY! POKEY! POKEY!
Kamek: Yes yes... Pokey, please open the envelope.
Pokey: Videogamerpat.
Videogamerpat: Alright! That's one small step for-
Roy: An idiot.
Videogamerpat: An idiot, one... hey, that's not right! It's-
Roy: Shut up, you idiot!
Videogamerpat: ... Oh.
Roy: That's better. Now get this battle started!
Culex: Yes, I am anxious to battle as well.
Kamek: Alright, then start the battle... Pokey.
Audience: POKEY! POKEY! POKEY!
Pokey: Hi.
Audience: YAY!!!
Pokey: Fight.
Audience: Ok!
Pokey: No... Roy and Culex.
Audience: Oh...
Pokey: Fighters, fight.
Culex: Ice Crystal, Diamond Saw!
Kamek: And we're off! Culex has sent a diamond saw in Roy's direction... but Roy seems to be wiggling his fingers! If he doesn't do something quick he's going to be chopped in half! Oh, I can't look!
Clang!
Kamek: Is it safe to look? Well, it seems that the diamond saw bounced off Roy, or something.
Culex: Interesting. Earth Crystal, Ex-
Roy: CONTAIN!!!
Flash! Flash! Flash! Flash!
Roy: Ooh, I'm good...
Kamek: I don't believe it! Roy has cast a magic spell that has encased Culex's crystals in some kind of energy fields! Who would ever think Roy would use a magic move in a battle?
Roy: Now, to finish you-
SLAP!
Roy: Owch! What, who hit me?
Culex: I'm sorry Koopaling, I'll move a little slower next time.
Roy: Yeah, you'd better-
SLAP!
Roy: Hey!
Culex: Still too fast to see? A pity, I was moving painstakingly slow.
Roy: Why you...
Kamek: This battle is really heating up! Roy used an advanced spell to lock away Culex's crystals, but it appears that Culex also has a very speedy physical move! What can Roy do to counter?
Roy: Mega Pu-
SLAP!
Roy: Grr...
Culex: I regret that I will need to end this battle earlier than I expected. Without my crystals, I can't take any chances... you understand.
Roy: Power Sl-
SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP! SLAP!
Roy: Old MacDonald had a... T W 3 fence foo...
Gong!
Kamek: And Roy is down! I don't think he'll be getting up from this one! Nope, here comes-
Audience: POKEY! POKEY! POKEY!
Kamek: -to end the battle.
Pokey: Culex-
Roy: Counter.
SHPLOOM!!!
Culex: Groah!
Bong!
Kamek: Oh, Roy somehow had it left in him to do a counter attack while Culex's back was turned! Now they're both down!
Pokey: Get up. One... two... three... four...
Culex tries to get up, but falls back down to the floor.
Pokey: ... five... six... seven... eight...
Roy manages, barely, to pull himself to his feet.
Pokey: ... nine... ten... Roy wins.
Gong! Roy falls down again.
Kamek: I don't know how Roy managed to pull this one off... but I guess if you're determined enough, you can do anything. Well, normally someone would get electrocuted, but I don't think Roy's up to it right now... so, from all of us here at Roy's Sports Hall-
Audience: POKEY! POKEY! POKEY!
Kamek: Good night.
Pokey: Bye.
Audience: YAY!!!
The winner:
The loser:
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Now you have a choice:
You can go back and memorize the rest
of the battles.
You can go back to the Boxing
Arena, because I know you loved it so much!
Anyone who rats about the conditions
here will be personally pounded by me! If you'd like a pounding, you can
also go back to Lemmy's
Land.
