The referee:

The announcer:

***

Buster Beetle: Today is the day we've all been waiting for! Today, Nintendo places me in another game. RIGHT NINTENDO?!

Roy: SECURITY!!!

A parade of Boom Booms storms the announcer's booth and retrieves the microphone from the disgruntled ref. The lead Boom Boom hands the mic to Mastadoom, who is again standing outside the box.

Mastadoom: I believe we are doomed for another messy event thanks to Buster.

Buster Beetle: Buster Beetle! You must always say my full name!

Mastadoom: My suppositions of doom are nearly always correct. Judging on the opponents, I think we're also doomed to have one of the most boring battles ever, but if I'm lucky this time my prediction of doom will be wrong. Now, the fighters. In the Red Corner, it's the Champion. Although he has won once, I feel he is doomed to fail before winning three. From Mario 1, it's Blooper!

Blooper: I'm ready to fight! Only, I don't see my opponent.

Mastadoom: Hopefully, Blooper will remember to turn around. Otherwise we are definitely doomed to see a boring battle.

Blooper: Whoops, I messed up.

Mastadoom: In the Blue Corner, it's the Challenger. Eleven years closer to death, from Mario World, it's Rip van Fish!

Rip van Fish: Zzz...

Mastadoom: Would the referee please wake up the fighter?

Buster Beetle: Say my name, and give me the mic, and then I'll consider the possibilty that maybe I might think about waking him up.

Mastadoom: ... Larry, your prediction?

Larry: I refuse to make the sleeper pick, so I have no choice. I'm going with Blooper.

Mastadoom: Finally, before we battle, we must find out who the Tourist of the Week is. Roy?

Roy: This time around, the Tourist of the Week is... Foshi!

Foshi: Hey, I won!

Spike Top: I can't believe Lemmy picked a Yoshi.

Foshi: I said I'm a Koopa!

Roy: I think Lemmy just likes "oshi". Mastadoom?

Mastadoom: Remember, the Tourist of the Week may be doomed to be shocked. Now, it's time to battle at last. Will the ref please start the battle?

Buster Beetle: Nope, I don't think so. Maybe tomorrow.

Mastadoom: That's too bad, because I heard that Nintendo really likes good referees. In fact, doing a bad job may doom you to the land of neglected characters.

Buster Beetle: What?! No way! Well... just in case... Alright fighters, listen up! I know you're both lame, but at least try to make this look good. And don't cheat, or it'll make me look bad, as near-impossible as that may sound. So, fight!

Blooper: Ink Blast!

Mastadoom: Blooper starts off the battle with an Ink Blast. It should come to no surprise that it hits the still-sleeping Rip van Fish.

Rip van Fish: Zzz...

Blooper: This oughta wake him up. Tentacle!

SLAP!

Rip van Fish: Zzz...

Mastadoom: The Champion has used a powerful slap attack, but it's not enough to stop our snoozer.

Blooper: Ok, well if that won't work, I'll give him a whole Body Slam!

Mastadoom: Blooper slams his entire body into his opponent! It looks like he's doomed... or maybe just still sleeping.

Rip van Fish: Zzz...

Blooper: This is rediculous! I'll shock him awake!

Mastadoom: Our Champion is now flashing yellow, I guess he's electrified. He reaches out and touches Rip van Fish... who jumps! Oh, wait, that was just the reaction of the electricity. He didn't move on his own.

Rip van Fish: Zzz...

Blooper: What am I doing wrong?! Alright, that's it, now I'm calling in my kids to help!

As if on cue, four tiny Bloopers show up and start pummeling Rip van Fish with their tiny tentacles.

Mastadoom: It's an interesting attack, but judging from previous attacks, it would appear that Rip van Fish is doomed to remain a-

Rip van Fish: Heehee hahaha! Hey, quit it, that tickles!

Mastadoom: Sleep? Well, look who decided to wake up.

Rip van Fish: Oh yeah, I *yawn* forgot, I was supposed to battle. Now, where's my opponent?

Blooper: Zzz...

Mastadoom: Who would have guessed? Rip van Fish is up, but it seems that all his attacks have exhausted Blooper to the point of needing to sleep. I told you we were doomed to have a boring battle.

Rip van Fish: What? He's sleeping? How dare he copy me?! Ooh, I'm so mad...

Mastadoom: Now the Challenger is turning red and flashing. I'd say Blooper is doomed just about now.

Rip van Fish: POWER SLAM!!!

Blooper: YAH!!! I made a fool of myself. Oh... *gong*

Rip van Fish: That'll teach you to sleep! Yeah... zzz...

Mastadoom: I don't know how, but Rip van Fish has managed to win. So, from all of us here at Roy's Sports Hall...

Foshi: Don't you- BlagadiblagadiblagadiAAG! End transmission!

The winner:

The loser:

Now you have a choice:
You can go back and memorize the rest of the battles.
You can go back to the Boxing Arena, because I know you loved it so much!
Anyone who rats about the conditions here will be personally pounded by me! If you'd like a pounding, you can also go back to Lemmy's Land.