Star 3, Shoot to the Island in the Sky
They jump into the painting again, in search of Star 3.
Axem Leader: And to think… we could have been at home watching a movie or something if it wasn’t for that stupid Archie’s burger.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Sigh… You’re right. I wonder how Mario is doing.
Axem Leader: It’s only been like 15 minutes, he’ll be ok.
They look around and Axem Leader points to the floating island.
Axem Leader: I bet that's where we have to go.
Lil Cheep Cheep: What makes you think that?
A sign next to Axem Leader says “Star 3 is on the Floating Island”.
Axem Leader: I have my ways…
Axem Leader and Lil Cheep Cheep run up the bridge and are attacked continuously by water bombs.
Axem Leader: Argh! I wanna go to a different level!
Lil Cheep Cheep: Quit your whining, there is a cannon right there that we can use to get up there!
Axem Leader hops
in the cannon and accidentally shoots himself at the bottom of the island
and falls back
down.
Axem Leader: Pain...
Lil Cheep Cheep: You have no experience with these things…
Lil Cheep Cheep jumps into the cannon and lands on the island.
Lil Cheep Cheep: This is going to be easier then we thought…
Lil Cheep Cheep
walk towards the box that has the Star in it. He is about to hit it when
a giant water bomb
conks him on
the head and he faints.
Axem Leader: …
Axem Leader shoots himself up again and hits himself on the head.
Axem Leader: Yarg!
Axem Leader tries again and again.
Axem Leader: Argh! I really hate this!
Axem Leader hops in one more time. He aims the cannon all the way up and shoots.
Axem Leader: Well it looks like I will finally make it!
Axem Leader misses by three centimeters and falls back to the ground.
Axem Leader: X_X
From all the times
Axem Leader hit his head under the Island, it forms a crack and half of
the Island is
now starting
to fall. Lil Cheep Cheep slides to the edge, still knocked out.
Axem Leader: AHH!!! OH NO OH NO!!! What am I goin’ to do?!
Axem Leader runs around in a panic but is hit on the head by a water bomb.
Axem Leader: Ugh...
The “!” box falls off the Island and lands next to Axem Leader.
Axem Leader: Ooh, what’s this thingie?
Axem Leader picks it up and looks for Lil Cheep Cheep. He forgets he is still up on the Floating Isle from all the times he hit his head.
Axem Leader: He must be where the Chain Chomp is…
He walks over
and stupidly pets the Chain Chomp. He gets eaten, and the Chain Chomp spits
the “!” box at
Lil Cheep Cheep,
who gets hit and wakes up.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Ah, what a nice nap... where am I? Oh yeah, where's that Star?!
Lil Cheep Cheep sees the “!” box right next to him. He whaps the box and the Star pops out.
Star theme.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Here we go!
Axem Leader and Lil Cheep Cheep pop out of the painting.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Hmm… That was pretty easy.
Axem Leader is on the floor barely breathing.
Axem Leader: I officially hate really big chomp thingies on chains.
Lil Cheep Cheep: That’s nice.
An explosion is heard in the lobby of the castle.
Axem Leader: Oh what the? What was that?
Lil Cheep Cheep: Sounded like an explosion…
They walk into the castle lobby to find everything quaking.
Axem Leader: Ahh!
The floor starts
to shake and tremble as green pipes slowly emerge from under the tiles
of the floor. After
the quaking ends,
nine warp pipes stick out at different angles from the floor. There is
another earthquake and a giant warp pipe plows through the middle of the
smaller ones, sticking straight up. An arachnid-like
robot climbs
out of the larger warp pipe. The windshield opens to reveal Larry Koopa
scowling at the
two petrified
heroes. The windshield closes and the robot starts climbing on the walls
and then on the ceiling, then everywhere. Walking Piranha Plants emerge
from the smaller warp pipes and advance on Axem Leader and Lil Cheep Cheep.
Lil Cheep Cheep: This ain’t good.
Axem Leader: Ditto.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Fuse?
Axem Leader: Right!
Axem Leader looks around for anything that could replace a stepping stool.
Toad: Hi!
Axem Leader grabs Toad and places Lil Cheep Cheep on his head. They fuse to create Axeep Axeep.
Axeep Axeep (Axem Leader): Let’s prune these little monsters.
Lil Axe (Lil Cheep Cheep): Let’s go!
Axeep Axeep jumps to avoid the bite of a Piranha Plant, then slices at it and kills it. Axeep Axeep throws Lil Axe at Larry, but he ricochets off and causes no damage to Larry’s robotic spider.
Axeep Axeep: Shoot!
Larry shoots a stream of metallic liquid at Axeep Axeep and it hits his axe arm. He is shot backwards and his arm is plastered against the wall in the sticky goo.
Lil Axe: Patooie! What is this stuff? Metal spider web?
Axeep Axeep: I can’t get my arm free, looks like you’re stuck there…
Lil Axe: Aw shoot! Defuse!
They turn back
to normal and Lil Cheep Cheep slides out easily. He yanks Axem Leader free,
just in time as
Larry shoots
another blast of metallic spider web where he had just gotten free from.
Axem Leader strafes around Larry’s robot while holding Lil Cheep Cheep
like a shotgun, shooting blasts of water. This makes the robot malfunction
and it blows up. Larry flies out, and lands on his feet. He takes out his
wand and the remaining eight Piranha Plants take their place behind him.
Larry Koopa: You’ll never win!
Larry turns around
and does a spell on the Piranha Plants. They turn into one giant eight-headed
Piranha Plant, it’s eight heads nearly touching the ceiling. Larry jumps
onto the highest head and directs them to
attack Axem Leader
and Lil Cheep Cheep.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Oh my gawd!
Axem Leader still has Lil Cheep Cheep like a shotgun.
Axem Leader: Here, drink this!
Axem Leader makes Lil Cheep Cheep drink some oily stuff.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Bleack! What is this stuff?
Axem Leader: Oh nothing, just lighter fluid.
Lil Cheep Cheep: O_O;;
Axem Leader lights a match and puts it in front of Lil Cheep Cheep, then orders him to blow.
FOOM!!!
Larry is now riding
a flaming eight-headed Piranha Plant. Larry does a back-flip off and lands
on his feet. He
watches as his
plant shrivels up and dies before him.
Larry Koopa: You… killed… my… PLANT!!!
Larry Koopa fires
glowing neon rings at the two. They are hit and they go straight into the
wall. Lil Cheep
Cheep slides
up the wall and flies at Larry; he lands right in front of him.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Ack!
Larry pulls back his wand for a fierce attack. Lil Cheep Cheep covers his face. Axem Leader jumps over Lil Cheep Cheep and tackles Larry to the ground. He takes his wand and tosses it backwards. Lil Cheep Cheep catches it. Axem Leader throws Larry against the wall. Lil Cheep Cheep swings the wand around and brings it down on Larry. Gold and red colors shoot out of the tip of the wand, and Larry gets turned into a frog.
Larry: Ribbit!
Larry hops away.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Wow, that was amazing. Thanks for the save.
Axem Leader: Eh, don’t mention it. Let’s go find the next Star!
Star 4, 7 Red Coins in Bob-omb Battlefield
Lil Cheep Cheep: So now what?
Axem Leader: I dunno, let’s go see what else we can do…
Axem Leader jumps into the painting, followed by Lil Cheep Cheep.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Hmm… That’s odd.
Axem Leader: What?
Lil Cheep Cheep: I never really noticed those red coins ‘til now…
They both look at a red coin, hovering above the tiny wooden elevator.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Do you think they’re important?
Axem Leader: I think so, let’s go check it out.
They walk over to it. Lil Cheep Cheep touches it, and it disappears. A number floats up where it had been before. “1…”
Lil Cheep Cheep: Hmm… Strange… How many do you think there are?
Axem Leader: Who knows, let’s go look for more.
They turn around to see one on top of a black rock.
Lil Cheep Cheep: How we gonna reach that one?
Axem Leader: Hmm- Whoa!
Axem Leader had taken a step backwards and stepped on something hard. He turned around to see a Koopa, out of its shell and running off. He looks down to see his foot on top of a green sparkling shell.
Axem Leader: What the- AHHH!!!
Before Axem Leader can say anything, his foot seems to be glued to the shell as he darts forward and back, in circles, and jumping up and down. After a while, Axem Leader is jumping off the mountain, going up and down it, going in and out of the Chain Chomp’s reach, and just about everything.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Hey, can ya stop foolin’ around for a sec and get the red coin from the rock?
Axem Leader: Okey doke!
Axem Leader is on the mountaintop, so
he jumps off and, with perfect aim, lands on the red coin. It
disappears and a number appears. “2…”
Lil Cheep Cheep clapped as Axem Leader jumps off the rock with a 360º
spin.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Heh heh, ok that’s enough. Time to get off that thing so we can find some more red coins.
Axem Leader: One problem…
Lil Cheep Cheep: And what’s that?
Axem Leader: I’m not sure how to get off, my feet feel like they’re glued to the shell.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Augh! Hold still…
Axem Leader: I don’t think I can stop either…
Lil Cheep Cheep: What?!
Lil Cheep Cheep is puzzling on how to stop the shell from going any further. Axem Leader keeps circling Lil Cheep Cheep.
Lil Cheep Cheep: I guess it wouldn’t hurt for you to just go get all the red coins quickly…
So that’s what he does. He goes up the
mountain side and gets another red coin. “3…” Then, he jumps off the top
of the mountain and landed on the Floating Island, where he gets the fourth
red coin hovering over a tree. “4…” With ease, he jumped right passed the
Chain Chomp to get the coin he is guarding. “5…” Axem Leader turns around
and goes by where Lil Cheep Cheep is and
gets another one. “6…” He turns around
again and crosses the bridge and gets two last ones, and the Star appears.
“7…” “8…”
Axem Leader: I’ve got it!
Lil Cheep Cheep jumps with joy, waiting to be tossed out of the painting once more. Waiting, waiting…
Lil Cheep Cheep: Um…
Lil Cheep Cheep flops over to where he thinks he heard Axem Leader’s scream last. He sees Axem Leader being roasted over an open fire with an apple in his mouth.
Lil Cheep Cheep: O_O;;
He jumps back as he sees a gray Goomba pop out from behind a pillar.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Uh oh…
Another one pops out, then another. After a few seconds, he is surrounded by at least ten gray Goombas.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Um… Can I have my friend back?
…
They all jump at him. Luckily, he jumps
in time. His plan is to flop by Axem Leader, grab him, then
get away as quickly as possible. But
he ends up getting tangled in the rope holding Axem Leader.
Lil Cheep Cheep: @#$%.
Axem Leader: Uh… hello.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Well, it was nice knowing you buddy.
Axem Leader: Same here.
Just as they are saying their final goodbyes, they hear a rustling sound.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Do you hear-
???: ATTACK!!!
Hundreds of red Bob-ombs had just jumped
over the fence and capture the gray Goombas with nets,
hundreds of gray Goombas came pouring
out from the mountain. More nets- more Goombas- annoying dashes- everywhere.
Lil Cheep Cheep had managed to get free and untie Axem Leader. Axem Leader
points toward the top of the mountain where the glow of a bright yellow
Power Star is in view. Lil Cheep Cheep nods, and off they go, pummeling
gray Goombas as they go. It is too hard to get through the army of Goombas,
because they are all going the opposite direction. At one point,
Lil Cheep Cheep is being carried off
and Axem Leader is alone. He races, stepping on random Goombas. Lil Cheep
Cheep catches up with Axem Leader and they are both going up the spiral
path up to the mountain top.
Axem Leader: We’re almost there…
They see it, the Power Star is right
in front of them. They are about to grab it when a giant gray
Goomba stops them.
Goomba King: Stop! I cannot let you touch that Power Star!
Axem Leader: And who are you to stop us?
Lil Cheep Cheep: Wow! Are you the real Goomba King from Paper Mario?! Can I have your autograph?
Goomba King: Er… Yes, I am. And no.
Axem Leader: Step aside, we’re gonna get that Power Star behind you.
Goomba King: Oh, you mean the royal icon? I’m sorry, but that’s not yours to have.
Axem Leader: And how, may I ask, are you going to stop us?
Goomba King: You dare challenge the great Goomba King?
Axem Leader: Yes! And it kinda looks like it’s two against one, so you'd better just give up if you want to avoid a severe beating.
Goomba King: On the contrary my little friend…
Two Goombas step out from behind the Goomba King. One blue, the other red.
Axem Leader: Shoot… Outnumbered… Eh, we’ll still beat you with ease… Right Lil Cheep Cheep?
…
Axem Leader: Lil Cheep Cheep?!
Lil Cheep Cheep’s staring at the Goomba King.
Axem Leader: Er… Stop that will ya?
Lil Cheep Cheep: Hwahh? Oh, uh… Sorry. Yeah! Whatever he said…
Goomba King: Then get ready to figh-
Axem Leader immediately pushes the Goomba King off the side of the mountain.
Axem Leader: Simple enough, now for his goonies…
Blue and Red Goomba: Master! Argh, you’ll pay!
Red: Fuse!
Blue: Gotcha!
The red and blue Goomba fuse together to make a huge purple Goomba.
Axem Leader: Hey, that’s copyrighted ya know…
Axem Leader takes out a stepping stool out of his pocket and places Lil Cheep Cheep on it. They fuse once again, to make Axeep Axeep.
Lil Axe (Lil Cheep Cheep): Wee! This gets funner everytime!
Axeep Axeep (Axem Leader): Shut up…
Axeep Axeep jumps backwards and gets into fighting position.
Axeep Axeep hacks at the purple Goomba, but it gets the axe with its jaws and swallows it.
Lil Axe: Arrrgghh…
Axeep Axeep: Ahh! No!
Axeep Axeep punches the over-grown Goomba in the jaw, but breaks his wrist!
Axeep Axeep: AUGH!!!
Axeep Axeep falls to his knees in agony. The Goomba kicks him right off the mountain, and he breaks the rest of his arm.
Axeep Axeep: Oh…
Axeep Axeep jumps back up, holding his arm with his left hand. He slowly marches up the mountain, just to be mauled once more. He gets stomped on, then thrown off and mauled by the Chain Chomp. He uppercuts the Chain Chomp with his left arm and the Chain Chomp goes straight up. He runs back up the mountain.
Purple Goomba: Give up, it’s hopeless. I’ve not even begun to fight!
Axeep Axeep: Gah… Never!
Axeep Axeep does an axe kick, and just breaks his ankle.
Axeep Axeep: ARGH!!!
Axeep Axeep falls down, broken, bleeding, used, and undone. Meanwhile, Lil Axe is thinking of a plan while inside the Goomba’s stomach.
Lil Axe: Gotta think… This stomach is rock hard, I can’t slice my way through…
Lil Axe hears a crack, the sound of Axeep Axeep’s bones being crushed by the Goomba’s extreme weight.
Lil Axe: Argh! I can’t stand it… anymore… AAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!
Lil Axe starts flashing baby-blue and red. A blinding white light fills the Goomba’s stomach, and the next second later, the Goomba explodes, pieces flying everywhere. Lil Axe lies there, breathing hard. He sees the Power Star, just inches from him.
Lil Axe: Ack! I forgot, I can’t move around when I’m an axe. Axeep Axeep, snap out of it!
Axeep Axeep is lying motionless on the floor, all the bones in his body probably all broken by now. His eyes slowly open to see Lil Axe right in front of him. He barely opens his mouth to say something. Lil Axe can’t hear, but they defuse. He must of said defuse, or something. Since they are both connected physically, all of Lil Cheep Cheep’s bones are also broken.
Lil Cheep Cheep: Augh…
He manages to roll over and touch the Power Star. Lil Cheep Cheep and Axem Leader mumble something at the same exact moment, then they disappear. They fall out of the painting, Toad rushes in to them, finding them beaten and bruised.
Toad: Don’t worry, you’ll be good as new. Let me see here...
CRACK!!!
Toad: Er… I should get you two to a docter.
To Be Continued...
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