Leg 7
Phil is seen on a mountaintop.
Phil: I am here on top of Pagoda Peak. Five teams checked in here and ate sticky buns. Teams will leave on their next leg right..................................................................................... now.
Luigi and Wario: Catch a cloud... to Pyramid Park, where you'll find your next clue.
Mario: FINNALY! We get to go to Cheese Land!
Waluigi: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! DAIRY PRODUCT!
Wario: COME ON!
They run over to the cloud next to them
and jump on and fly off.
Yoshi: Let's go!
Birdo: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA- *cough cough hack weeze* MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Yoshi: That's Yoshi girl!
Birdo: Tee-hee!
Yoshi: We have to get on a cloud.
Birdo: THERE'S ONE! THERE'S ONE!
They jump on.
Dry Bones and Clawdia: Okay... okay... okay... okay... okay... okay...
Boo: OKAY WHAT?
Clawdia: We have to get on that there cloud and go to Pyramid Park.
Wendy: Let's go!
They jump on and shoot forth... It turns out the farther back they are, the faster they go, and the five teams end up side by side.
Yoshi: OH %*$&$*#&!
Boo: Ha!
Luigi: You're going down!
Clawdia: Take this!
Clawdia tosses a rolling pin to Luigi, who slams it against Yoshi. Yoshi grabs the rolling pin with his tongue, winds it up, and unwinds it into Dry Bones, causing him to fall apart.
Boo: Oh god! I'm fixing you up, don't worry!
Birdo spits an egg at Waluigi and he catches it but throws it at Birdo because he's scared of eggs. The egg splatters on Birdo. Yoshi swallows a melon and spits seeds at everyone, sending them toppling towards the sea.
Mario: WAHOO!
Luigi: OWOWOWOOWOW!
Clawdia and Wendy: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Dry Bones: ...
Boo: Thank DAD I can float.
Wario: WAHOO!
Waluigi: AAAAAHHHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
They crash into the water .584943 inches away from Pyramid Park.
Teams: O_O
Yoshi and Birdo land and everyone races for the clue.
Boo: Go to the quicksand pit on this side of the desert to get-
Yoshi: The next clue!
Mario: Warning! Cheese Land ahead!
Luigi: %&$*!
They all run.
Yoshi: I'LL WIN!
Wario: NO!
Wario grabs Yoshi's snout and throws him into Birdo, and they topple into Wendy and Clawdia. The other teams keep going.
Luigi: CLAWDIA, USE YOUR ROLLING PIN IF HE TRIES TO STOP YOU!
Wario: I see it over there!
They run up and rip open a clue.
Mario: Swing or Sting.
Luigi: Wow, your memory is good.
Boo: Roadblock!
Wario: One team member must jump into the quicksand, which will warp them to the other side of the desert. There they must go to the oasis and swim around and collect five coins to get their clue.
Boo, Wario, and Luigi jump in as Clawdia and Wendy come up.
Clawdia: Wendy... please do this, I'm tired.
Wendy: Okay.
Wendy dives in as Yoshi and Birdo, who has a rolling pin stuck in her mouth, come up.
Waluigi: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! DINOSAUR GOT UGLIER!
Mario: Cheesie weesie!
Dry Bones: Wow Clawdia, you taught that ^*$*$ a lesson.
Birdo: Mmmmmppppppphphhhhhhhh!
Yoshi jumps in as Wario, Luigi, and Boo are shot out the other side and jump into the oasis.
Boo: Come on!
A gate opens, releasing three gators into the water.
Luigi: O_O
They begin collecting coins and avoiding the gators. A gator goes to clamp onto Luigi, but..
????: HIYAH!
Rings fly over and clamp the gators jaws shut, then Wendy jumps in.
Boo: 3
Luigi: 4
Wario: 2
Wendy: 1
Yoshi: HERE I AM TO WRECK THE DAY!
Yoshi jumps in.
Boo and Wendy: Got one!
Luigi goes for one but Yoshi snatches it.
Boo: 4
Luigi: 4
Wario: 3
Wendy: 2
Yoshi: 2
Boo and Luigi: YYYYAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!
They both jump, grab two coins each, and toss the extra down to Wendy.
Luigi: Get the clue!
Boo: Detour! Chomp or Jars. Chomp- Ride two Chomps. One takes you halfway to the clue and the other takes you the other way. Jar- Pick the one of twenty jars that has the clue. Five mistakes shuffles the jars up.
They jump into the quicksand.
Wario: 4
Wendy: 4
Yoshi: 3
Wario: Wendy, there's two over there.
Wendy goes for it but Yoshi flings out his tongue.
Wario: THAT'S ENOUGH!
Wario grabs Yoshis tongue and ties it in a knot.
Yoshi: MMMMPPPPPHHHHHHH! ... Y....ou....... lit....t..le............
Wendy tosses one to Wario and they both
run, get a clue, and jump into the quicksand.
Dry Bones and Clawdia: My head...
Mario: CCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEE!!!
Waluigi: NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTT CCCCCCCHHHHHEEEEESSSSSEEE!!!
The others jump out.
Boo: Lets go to the jars fast.
Luigi: To Jars, Mario.
Mario: I wanna go do south path.
Wario and Wendy: Let's go Jars.
They run to see five sets of twenty
jars. Each pick a set and begin choosing.
Yoshi jumps out.
Birdo: Finaly... YOUR TONGUE!
Yoshi: GGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRR CHOMP!
Yoshi drags Birdo across the sand and
jumps on a Chomp and shoots across the sand.
Dry Bones: Which one, Boo?
Luigi and Mario: HHmmmmmmmm.
Luigi and Boo pick one and find a clue.
Boo: Let's go!
Luigi and Boo's teams run.
Dry Bones: Go to the pitstop at the Chomp castle.
They run.
Clawdia and Waluigi: OH MY GOD!
Wendy: THIS ONE!
She gets a clue but Wario gets his shuffled
AGAIN.
Yoshi: OFF OFF OFF! ON ON ON!
They get on Chomp two and begin another
mad dash.
Wario: I GOT IT!
They grab a clue and run.
Luigi: There is the pitstop, up several flights of stairs.
Luigi, Dry Bones, and Clawdia's teams
run up the stairs.
Wario: OH GOD! A clue box... and YOSHI ALERT!
Yoshi's team shoots up, jumps off, grabs
a clue, and begins a neck and neck race with Wario and Waluigi.
The first three teams jump on,
Phil: Team Clawdia, Mario, and Dry Bones... YOU'RE TEAM 1!
Dry Bones and Boo - 1st
Clawdia and Wendy - 1st
Mario and Luigi - 1st
Waluigi, from being scared of Yoshi and Wario fighting each other on the ground, jumps on the mat with Birdo. Wario gets up but Yoshi pelts Wario's with watermelon seeds, knocking him over. Wario and Yoshi get up and throw punches at each other.
Luigi and Dry Bones: GO WARIO!
Clawdia: Get him, Wario!
Yoshi cracks an egg over Wario's head and Wario chucks hot peppers into Yoshi's mouth, making Yoshi dizzy and his eyes water.
Birdo: Oh no... Hhhmmmmm...
Birdo flings around and slaps Waluigi, knocking him off the mat.
Phil: I love action.
Wario uppercuts Yoshi, throwing him down on the stairway, which he rolls down and falls into a gator's mouth. Wario gets on the mat and watches Birdo throw repeated slaps onto a screaming Waluigi. Waluigi then screams so loud, the wind pressure blows Birdo into the air and she lands on a Chomp that carries her and tosses her into the quicksand pit, then rocks cave in and block her escape.
Phil: Wario and Waluigi... You're team 4.
Wario and Waluigi - 4th
Phil: Okay everyone, listen up. Tomorrow you eight will leave on the final elimination leg, and six of you will embark in the final leg for $1,000,000. For now you may enter the castle, drink water, and eat chocolate. The leg ends as I say bad night.