Uncle K. Rool

By Mary Beyer

As the morning sun rose over Castle Koopa, all the inhabitants stirred. They each woke, one by one. In the Koopalings’ rooms, they each woke as the bright, cheerful sunlight entered their bedrooms. They each got up to close the blinds.

“Whoa, that’s one bright sun out there,” Hip mumbled as he walked down the stairs, wavering from the sleep strain. As he scanned the room, he saw his Dad over at the desk. He was scribbling a letter. Then he tossed it in an envelope and gave it to a waiting Lakitu. Hip walked over suspiciously. “What did that letter say?” he asked.

King Koopa turned around to face Hip. “I was writing a letter to my cousin, your uncle. He lives on the island of Congo Bongo.”

Hip looked confused. “Uncle… who? And I’ve never heard of Congo Bongo Island.” Hip wondered if his Dad really had a cousin.

“Uncle K. Rool. He’s in the conquering business too, I just found out. That’s why I’m so eager to hear what he has to say, maybe we could team up,” Koopa explained.

“Oh… cool,” Hip replied, returning upstairs back to bed. He pulled the blanket over his head. He slept for another hour before the sunlight found it’s way around the blinds. “Stupid sun,” Hip muttered as he wobbled downstairs. On the way, he almost crashed into Hop.

“Watch it, Ice Boy!” Hop mumbled. Hop bonked into a wall before continuing down the stairs. He rubbed his face gingerly.

“Careful, Midget!” Hip shot back sleepily. He had trouble seeing through the mist that was in his eyes. He rubbed his eyes and then he could see.

All the Koopalings were waiting for the two twins. They looked at them oddly as they stumbled around.

Soon everyone was ready. But they had no clue where they were going. They weren’t taking warp pipes, but they were flying by Lakitu. They were waiting for Koopa to tell them where they were going.

“Yo Dad! Where are we going?” Bully asked. He was as curious as the rest.

“Why… I’m surprised you don’t remember. At five this morning I told you all we were going to visit your Uncle K. Rool on Congo Bongo Isle!” Koopa said, in tones of mock-surprise.

They all stared as Koopa summoned the Lakitus necessary to ferry them over the sea. They all clambered into two Lakitu clouds and off they went.

“Hey Dad! Are we there yet?” Big Mouth asked for the fifth time.

“No!” Koopa answered. He shot a look at Big Mouth. Big Mouth fell silent.

After many hours of flying, the family finally reached Congo Bongo Isle. The Lakitu had been instructed to land near the mines, not the jungle. K. Rool’s nemesis, Donkey Kong, lived in the jungle.

As they walked in, the Koopalings looked around the open area. It was basically a giant hall. Anyone could walk in at anytime.

“If there isn’t some kinda defenses here, I’m gonna leave,” Kookie whispered to Bully. He nodded in agreement.

A giant platform lowered from the ceiling. On it stood a person, and that person was Koopa’s cousin, King K. Rool.

“Ahh, Bowser! How nice to see you again. And what have we here? Ah… seven, just like in your letter,” K. Rool said. Because of the relationship, K. Rool had every right to call King Koopa Bowser.

Koopa nodded. He introduced his Koopalings one by one. After the introductions were made, K. Rool decided to introduce his minions.

“KLUMP! KRUSHA! GET IN HERE!” K. Rool yelled.

Hip leaned over to Hop. “Oh yeah, they’re related.” Hop nodded.

A tubby soldier with a general’s symbol on his helmet rode in on a mine cart followed by a tall, strong-looking blue crocodile.

“This is my idiot general Klump. And that is the strong, but head-strong idiot Krusha.” Suddenly K. Rool looked as if he remembered something. “How went the latest plan for the Crystal Coconut?”

Klump inched forward nervously. “Uh, sir, the Crystal Coconut still remains in the hands of Donkey Kong, sir.”

“WHAT!” K. Rool screamed. “Well, get working on a plan ‘B’ to get it… NOW!”

Kookie jumped forward. “Mind if I helped too?” K. Rool considered. Then, remembering how smart Koopa said he was, he said yes. The three went off into the jungle to snatch the Crystal Coconut.

K. Rool turned to face Koopa. “Cousin, I need your help. Those two, no matter how brilliant the scheme, will always fail. Can you help me achieve glory? Or rather, will your children help?”

“Sure. How 'bout causing some trouble in the jungle?” Koopa asked his kids.

They all got up and cheered: “YEA!” K. Rool smiled. The Koopalings rushed out of K. Rool’s and towards the jungle.

Donkey Kong was relaxing in Cranky’s cabin. He heard a bump outside. He ran to the window. As he looked out, a coconut hit him in the head.

“Oww…” DK yelled. Then he looked up. “Who’s up there? Huh? Answer me!” The reply came in three more coconuts.

“Ha ha ha ha!” voices laughed. DK jumped out the window and climbed on top of Cranky’s house.

Cranky walked to the window and looked out just in time to see DK climbing up on the roof.  “You Bone-Headed Baboon! Get down here!” Cranky yelled. He shook his cane at DK.

DK looked down over his shoulder. “Sorry, but there’s someone up here! I’ve gotta check it out!” DK climbed up further.

Kookie and the others grinned as they watched DK run about on the roof. Kookie signaled Klump and Krusha. Klump walked up to the door and knocked twice.

“Klump! What’re you doing here?” Cranky yelled. DK swerved around.

“KLUMP?!” DK shouted. He started to run to a nearby tree to climb down.

Cheatsy hopped down right in front of him. “Well, well, well! So you are the famous Donkey Kong…”

DK looked at Cheatsy, trying to figure out what he was. “Yea, and what’s it to you… whatever you are?”

“Ha ha ha! Have you never heard of the Mushroom Kingdom? And of the Koopa Clan?” Cheatsy laughed. He jabbed his wand at DK.

“Uh… I think Cranky told me about it once… and the terrible Koopa Clan that keeps trying to take it over. Kinda like King K. Rool.” DK said.

“Well, I’m the youngest of the Clan… Cheatsy Koopa!” Cheatsy bowed in front of DK. He prepared to give the signal.

“CHEATSY?” DK yelled. “You’re a part of the Koopa Clan? Yah! What’re you doing here? You live, like, tens-of-hundreds of miles away!”

“That’s right! And we’ve come…” Cheatsy shot up a strand of O’s. “To give Uncle K. Rool a hand!” Cheatsy smiled melodiously.

Hip looked at the rest of his siblings. That was the signal! He pulled out his wand as he prepared to jump down from the trees.

“UNCLE K. ROOL?!” DK yelled. “But…that’s impossible!”

“Not really…and guess what!” Cheatsy smiled. “There are six more of us! NOW!” He waved his arm up at the trees.

“ATTACK!” Kookie yelled. He jumped down from the trees. Kookie fell behind DK.

“ATTACK!” Bully yelled. He followed Kookie and landed next to him.

“ATTACK!” Hip and Hop shouted together as they landed beside Cheatsy.

“Yea! ATTACK! Crush him! Help Uncle K. Rool!” Big Mouth declared as he spun in the air.

“Get that rotten ape! ATTACK!” Cootie-Pie screamed. She whipped out her wand as she fell in place with her brothers.

DK looked confused. “Who are you six?” he asked, scratching his head.

Kookie spun his wand. “I’m Kookie Koopa! HA HAA HA HAA HAAAA!” He laughed his crazy laugh.

Bully threw up his wand and caught with great speed and agility. “I’m Bully Koopa! Hyah!” He grinned.

Hip and Hop spun around then clashed their wands together. “I’m Hip! Ha haa hah!” Hip yelled.

Hop jumped and landed again beside Hip. “And I’m Hop!” Hip and Hop decided to say more than their brothers. “Together we are…THE KOOPA TWINS! HA HAA HAAA!” Hip and Hop screeched.

After waiting for so long, Big Mouth was pretty riled up. “And I’m Big Mouth Koopa! And you’re dust, you’re toast, you’re…done!”

“And I’m King Koopa’s only daughter! The one, the only, the beautiful, COOTIE-PIE!” Cootie-Pie laughed.

The Koopalings assembled in front of DK and all pointed their wands at him. “Take this you Neanderthal Ape!” they all yelled.

“WAIT!” Kookie jumped out of the crowd as an idea formed in his head. “Should we just paralyze him and bring him back to K. Rool’s?”

Hip thought was a good idea. “Yea! Then he’ll see what a great job we did!”

Kookie nodded. “So… we’ll get him… and Bully! You go get the Crystal Coconut! Hip… FREEZE DONKEY KONG!”

Hip smiled. “Gotcha Kookie! Ice Blast…FREEZE!” Wave after wave of ice fell over DK, encasing him in a frozen block of ice.

Bully walked back, holding the Crystal Coconut in his hand. “It wasn’t that hard! Klump was keeping that old geezer busy! He didn’t even see me!”

Kookie grinned. He and the other Koopalings held the frozen DK. “Great! Let’s get going back to K. Rool’s mines!”

They jumped about the tree branches and with Klump, followed by Krusha, on the ground, it seemed like clear sailing to the mines. But one time a small monkey had tried to stop them.

“I don’t know who you are, but if you’re working with Klump and Krusha, I gotta stop ya! Give DK back! NOW!” the monkey had screeched.

Hip shot a glance at Kookie. “Should I freeze him?” he asked. He pulled out his wand.

“I do wish you could, but we’re having enough trouble carrying this big lug as it is! Just blast him outta the way.” Kookie looked at the small monkey.

“Wait… I will! 'cause… what if he tries to rescue DK? Then where will we be? Remember how Luigi broke in to the castle and rescued Mario and Yoshi?” Hip reasoned as he froze the monkey, whose name was Diddy.

“Fine. But you have to carry him!” Kookie grumbled. They continued on their way, carrying both apes.

Soon they had reached K. Rool’s mine. Bully set DK in front of K. Rool while Hip placed Diddy on the floor. Kookie presented the Crystal Coconut.

“Ooh! Finally! Thank you for all your help, cousin Bowser! Thank you, Koopalings!” K. Rool grinned as the Koopas packed up to leave.

“You’re welcome! Write anytime!” Koopa said to K. Rool.

“Yea! That was fun!” Cheatsy laughed. All the Koopas got into Lakitu clouds and flew off.

“Goodbye! Good luck for you taking over the Mushroom Kingdom!” K. Rool waved at the Koopas as they flew back over the ocean.

“Oh! Finally! I can wish to be the ruler of Congo Bongo Island!” K. Rool laughed evilly. Then he spotted Klump over by the thermostat.

“Hey! It’s too cold in here! I’m gonna turn up this thing to 80º!” Klump yelled.

“NOOOOOO!” K. Rool yelled. Klump’s hand twisted and the temperature rose dramatically. K. Rool slowly turned his head as he heard loud hissing.

“Banana Slamma!” DK yelled.

“Oh… foiled again… KLUMP! This is all your fault! Get the Crystal Coconut… NOW!” K. Rool shouted.

“Think K. Rool will ever win?” Hip asked Hop as they sped back to the Mushroom Kingdom.

“Yea… some day,” Hop replied as he stared across the blue waters. ‘K. Rool will win when we do,’ Hop thought silently.

The End

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