Dimentioís Return

By Red Koopa

Mario is walking in the swamps near Merleeís Mansion.

Mario: Dimentioís been quiet lately; I think heíll be paying me a visit soon.

Mario is a few yards away from the Mansion when he finds a newspaper of the place.

Mario: They have a newspaper?

It says stuff about Mimiís cutie pie workers and when Merlee may return. Meanwhile, Mr. L is watching from a distance.

Mr. L: (to self) Whereís the princess?

Mario walks inside to find workers on their break.

Mario: Whereís your boss?

Worker 1: In her office, down the hall then take a left, a right, a zigzag, the door on the right, down the hall, take the stairs into a door, go down some more stairs, and itís the door on the left.

Mario runs in those directions.

Worker 2: Dude, her office is right over there.

Worker 1: Itís so much better to have people work for it.

Mario comes in down a stairway and through a door and finds Mimi reading papers.

Mimi: Unless youíre Merlee or have permission to be in here you need to GET OUT!

Mario: Itís-a me, Mario!

Mimi: Oh, itís you, the red one who saved the world during SPM.

Mario: You owe me a favor and I need your help.

Mimi: What do you mean?

Mario recaps this story from his perspective..

Mimi: So you need the pages of a book to save the universe?

Mario: Oh yeah!

Mimi: Now that you mention it, I did see a strange page of a book float in the other day, but one of my incompetent workers thought it was dangerous and hid it in the deadly maze down in the basement. Even I donít know the way to get to the center where the page is hidden.

Mario: I guess Iím on my own again.

Mario walks out and starts running around the Mansion, with Mr. L secretly following him.

Mimi: I forgot to tell you about the walking Chain Chomp that kills anyone who tries to enter the maze. Thatís why nobody is allowed in the maze.

Mario is far away by now and didnít hear her.

Mimi: Thatís too bad, I really liked that guy.

Mario: How many corridors is this place made of?

Mario runs through a door and walks down a few stairs, then goes through another door and into another hallway. Merlee appears from out of nowhere and startles Mario.

Merlee: Ah, you came, I knew you would, Merlon told me you were coming so I went looking for you if I could.

Mario: Next time I come here Iíll use a GPS. You didnít have to make this place so big and confusing.

Merlee: Yes, but thatís what I like best.

Merlee turns into Mimi.

Mimi: Despite our minor differences, I just want to help you get Dimentio back. Plus I know the way to the deadly maze.

Mario: This whole place is a maze! All right, but no playing around. Oh, when I find that clown Iím going to make him wish he was never born.

Mr. L: Iíll tell that to him myself.

Mr. L jumps off a balcony and lands on his feet.

Mimi: If it isnít Mr. L. Iím Bleckís favorite minion. You were always like ďOh, look at me, Iím Mr. Tough Guy and Iím Bleckís favorite minion.Ē I hated that!

Mr. L: Well I was his favorite, you were just jealous.

Mario: Luigi, take that stupid suit off and help me.


Brobot enters as a car and transforms into a giant walking robot. Mr. L jumps into the cockpit.

Mr. L: My nameís not Luigi!

Brobot punches Mario into the wall as Mimi transforms into an elephant. Mimiís elephant trunk grabs Brobotís leg. Mario gets up and rips open the metal on Brobotís leg and rips out some wires. Brobot is forced to jetpack into the air and rams into several walls, breaking them.

Mr. L: That was titanium plating, you slimeball!  Iíll show you a thing or two, Bazooka mode!

Brobotís hands are replaced with bazookas that fire around the mansion. Mario and Mimi barely dodge them. Brobot fires more shots as Mimi turns into a humpback whale and swallows the shots without getting hurt. Mimi turns into a beaver and starts chewing through Brobotís plating.

Mr. L: I have a backup system.

Mario jumps onto Brobot and goes up to its head and rips its head off and starts pulling out wires. He jumps into the cockpit and throws out Mr. L and starts banging on the controls, when he sees a self-destruct button. He pushes that and the eject button at the same time. He lands on the floor as Brobot explodes.

Mr. L: No! Brobot! You fools, I spent three weeks working on its design! Youíll pay for this!

Mr. L gets up and punches Mimi, who turns back into her regular form. Mario runs up and punches Mr. L in the head, knocking him unconscious and reverting his mind back to Luigi.

Mario: Heíll be fine, heís just my brainwashed brother.

Mimi: Iíll carry him for you.

Mimi turns into a bear and carries Mr. L (Luigi) on her shoulder. Mario follows her for hours through the maze of corridors.

Mario: Are you sure you know the way to the deadly maze?

Mimi: Of course, just this place is really big, thatís all.


Dimentio: Has Mr. L checked back in yet?

Clone: No sir, we lost contact with him at Merleeís Mansion.

Dimentio: Thatís where a Prognosticus Page is, but what happened to Mr. L isÖ unfortunate, and I think we wonít be seeing him again as Mr. L. What about the Joker?

Clone: Joker doesnít want to go anywhere until heís finished sharpening his knives. He is very particular, sir.

Dimentio: What about Cackletta?

Clone: Cackletta is finishing a family feud down in the Beanbean Kingdom. She says she wonít be back for a few days. However, Doopliss just returned from Creepy Steeple with his belongings.

Dimentio: Send Doopliss then!

Clone: As you wish, my Lord.

Dimentio: Today I take the big name, Emperor Dimentio!

Clone: Very well, Your Highness. Doopliss is on his way, Emperor.

Dimentio smiles.

Dimentio: I do not expect Doopliss to succeed, but failure to get the page is only a minor setback.


Mimi: Here we are, the deadly maze. Even I donít know what path goes to the center where the page is. Plus thereís a wait-

Mario: We need that page now!

Mario runs to the left and many other directions while Mimi follows him in the form of a lion, carrying Luigiís unconscious body on her back. For hours they run until they get tired and start walking and later crawling on the ground, until Luigi falls off Mimi and rolls over around a corner. Mario and Mimi stop.

Mario: Iíll get him.

Luigi walks back around the corner.

Luigi: Mario, you donít need to- Wah!

Luigi tripped over something.

Mario; Are you all right?

Luigi: Yeah, Iím fine.

Mario walks over to find out he tripped over an unconscious Luigi.

Mario: Mimi, quit playing tricks on me!

Mimi walks up next to him in her normal form.

Mimi: What?

Doopliss: *in Luigiís voice*: Dang it, and it almost worked, too!

Luigi turns into Doopliss.

Mario: Not you again!

Doopliss: Iím just in it for the money, and Dimentio pays a lot. Plus I can shapeshift faster.

Mimi: Shapeshift! Shapeshift! Heís mine, Mario. The center of the maze is right there, with the page to the Dark Prognosticus. True form, come forth!

Mimi transforms into her true form while Mario grabs the page to the Dark Prognosticus. He puts it in his overalls. He joins the fight and throws rubees at Doopliss, pushing him back- and into the killer walking Chain Chomp.


The Chain Chomp charges at Mimi and Mario, giving Doopliss the time to escape.

Mario: Run! I know the way back!

Mimi turns into a cheetah and puts Mario and Luigi on her back. She runs from the chasing Chain Chomp and eventually loses it and gets out of the maze.

Outside the mazeÖ

Mario: Thank you, Mimi, for helping me.

Mimi: Iíll help you anytime, Mario. Good luck stopping Dimentio. Iíll help you again if you want me to. I have to fix the walls and everything before Merlee gets back.

The real Luigi finally wakes up.

Luigi: OhÖ Where am I, and why am I in this ridiculous costume? All I remember is I was shopping for groceries, than Dimentio attacked, and then everything went black.

Mario: Long story. We need to get back to the Bitlands.

Luigi: Ok, whatever you say, Mario.


Doopliss: Then this killer Chain Chomp appeared and I had to escape. Iím sorry, my Lord. Do I still get paid.

Dimentio: I will not worry, your failure was only a minor setback. I will have my prize later, but youíll get paid your normal fee plus a bonus for impersonating Luigi. But you have to write a 15-page report on why Mario is so stupid and annoying, if you donít no bonus.

Doopliss: Iíll do it because I love money.

Dimentio: Joker, Cackletta, enter now!

The Joker and Cackletta enter.

Dimentio: Now, on to the present situation. Francis of the Bitlands has stolen Bowser Jrís Ancient Star for his own nerdy reasons. He doesnít know it contains a Dark Prognosticus page, nor did Bowser Jr. Iím sending Joker and Cackletta on a double mission. Go to the Bitlands, BUT DO NOT ATTACK the castle. Not yet. I have a plan for that, so stay out of level 3-1, only go to level 3-4. Got it?

Joker: Yay, more fun! Iíll play a joke on that lizard, one heíll never forget.

Cackletta: Weíll find the page! I want my sister ready for interrogation when I get back!

The Joker and Cackletta leave..

Dimentio: Everything is going as planned. Iíd better find a replacement for Mr. L.


Luigi: We have to stop Dimentio again!

Mario nods. Mario has given Luigi a recap.

Merlon: Bowser tried to get her, like, three times, but old magic tricks stopped him from locking her up.

Bowser: I hate that old man!

Bowser Jr. runs in, looking worried.

Bowser: Junior, you look troubled.

Bowser Jr: Dad, someone took the Ancient Star I had. All I found was a paper that says this.

The paper says ďnerrĒ.

Bowser: Francis, that geek! Why didnít he join the Geek Squad!

Peach: The Geek Squad is computer software!

Bowser: I knew that. And Iíll go get the Ancient Star.

Bowser Jr: Thereís more. I didnít know it at first, but it has a Dark Prognosticus page.

Mario: Bowser! Get his belonging back before Dimentio finds out.

Bowser Jr: I want to come too!

Bowser: All right, but stay next to me.

Bowser Jr: All right, Papa.

They walk out of the castle.

Mario: This isnít over yet. We need the other pages.

Peach: Mario, I donít know what to do if Dimentio gets the Prognosticus pages.

Mario: I hope Dimentio doesnít know where they are.

They watch Bowser and Bowser Jr. head to Fort Francis.

Read on!

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