Snifit X Season 5: Super Paper Snifit

By Red Shy Guy

Interlude

Snifit 1 walks out of the red door.

Merlon: Oh ho ho ho ho? You came out in one piece?! Then you truly are a hero… I guess. Now let’s go to my house.

Snifit 1 goes and enters Merlon’s little house.

Snifit 1: Your house is lame.

Merlon: SHUT UP! Now that you’ve gotten that Pure Heart, put it in a Heart Pillar.

Snifit 1: Why should I? I never even agreed to this adventure.

Merlon: If you don’t do anything all of life will cease to exist.

Snifit 1: Bu-

Flipsider: MERLON! S-SOME SNIFIT AND A GIRL JUST FELL FROM THE SKY!

Merlon and Snifit 1: !  WHAT?!

Flipsider: Come!

Merlon, Tippi, and Snifit 1 go and see Peach and Snifit 2. Snifit 2 gets up but Peach doesn’t.

Snifit 2: BRO!

Snifit 1: BRO!

Merlon: PEACH?!

Snifit 1: !  Hey, what happened?

Snifit 2: It’s a long story.

Snifit 1: I HATE STORIES NOW!

Merlon: You have to help the princess. Get some hot soup.

Snifit 2 pulls some out.

Merlon: What the?

Snifit 2: Magic and HP insurance. I had it in my backpack that I hid with me.

Peach eats it and gets up, but then falls back down hurt.

One explanation later…

Merlon: I see.

Peach: I wish I could help, but I’m hurt. Please, Snifits, help the entire world!

Snifit 2: Fine. Let’s go!

SNIFIT 2 JOINED YOUR PARTY.

Snifit 2: Let’s go!

The Snifits go to the outskirts of town, and after a brief trip they put the Pure Heart in a pillar. They go back to town to cook, run from an angry mob, yada yada yada.

Snifit 1: Let’s go.

They enter the next door.

Chapter 2-1: Swamp monsters do exist!

Snifit 2: So we need to find a shining heart. No prob.

Tippi: We must meet up with Merlee. Her house is across this swamp.

Snifit 1: Luckily there is no such thing as swamp monsters or killer crocodiles. Now let’s go!

The Snifits go through the places easily. and successfully dodge the monsters. They see a warp pipe and go in it. The Snifits don’t see anything inside.

Tippi: There is a ! Block above you, Snifit 1.

Snifit 1 jumps and a warp pipe appears. They go in it and see a giant chest. They open it and see Boomer.

Boomer: Hello, my name is Boomer. Let me ask-

Snifit 2: We ask. What can you do?

Boomer: I can blow up stuff.

Snifit 1: You’re in! Let’s go!

The Snifits go outside and move on. They see four doors and a big empty space. Snifit 1 badly draws a door and then it becomes a good door. They go in and move on but don’t see anymore monsters. They continue but-

????: GLAAAAAAARG!!!

Snifit 2: That was you, Tippi, right?

Tippi: N-no.

????: GLAAAAAAAAAARG!!!

A swamp monster emerges. It looks to be mostly made of mud and has one eyeball. It looks like a muddy Bigfoot.

Snifit 1: SWAMP MOSTERS DO EXIST! AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Snifit 1 runs away.

Tippi: Wait!

Snifit 2: I’ll handle this beast!

Snifit 2 15/15
VS
Swamp Monster ??/??

The Swamp Monster throws a punch, his hand extending as far as the whole battlefield, at Snifit 2 but Snifit 2 dodges and shoots him. The Monster feels no pain and just uppercuts Snifit 2. The monster jumps up and downcuts Snifit 2 into the floor. The monster goes to smash him but Snifit 2 rolls out of the way. Snifit 2 uses Bolt but the monster feels no pain. The monster throws his punch (much like how Trunkle throws his punches) but Snifit 2 jumps over it. The monster’s other hand grabs Snifit 2. Snifit 2 gets Boomer and throws him at the monster, which eats Boomer. Boomer explodes inside him and damages the monster, which lets go of Snifit 2 and spits out Boomer.

Snifit 2: Way to go! YIPES!

The Monster throws both punches but Snifit 2 successfully dodges. Snifit 2 throws Boomer like a bowling ball; the monster dodges but Boomer wasn’t lit so Boomer just goes back to Snifit 2. Snifit 2 runs toward the monster and the monster punches him but Snifit 2 throws the lit Boomer and he falls into the monster’s mouth and hurts the monster again. The Monster gets mad and more mud appears on him. His hands turn into maces, axes, and chainsaws. It throws its arms at Snifit 2, who roll-dodges it and throws Boomer, but the Monster dodges and slams its mace hand into Snifit 2, throwing him across the place. The Monster corners him but Snifit 2 has an ace up his sleeve and throws a Bob-omb into his mouth. The explosion doesn’t kill it but does stun it. Snifit 2 quickly grabs Boomer and throws it in its mouth. Boomer explodes, destroying the monster.

Battle Over. +1500 Points. Level Up. A new move learned?

Snifit 1: Nice! Let’s go!

The Snifits hit the Star Block and move on.

Dimentio: Very interesting.

Dimentio appears.

Dimentio: They managed to best my monster, but can they best Mimi? I can’t say yet whether these buffoons can do my dirty work. If Mimi comes back hurt I’ll know that I next must see these Snifits’ powers myself. But for now I must leave.

Dimentio teleports away.

Chapter 2-2: THIS MANSION IS TRYING TO KILL ME!

Snifit 1: So that’s Merlee’s Mansion. Well, better get in.

They go in and see Gnips.

Snifit 1: Hi.

Gnips: !

10 seconds later…

Snifit 1: How was I supposed to know they were going to throw me out?

Tippi: Let’s just go again.

Snifit 1: Hmmmmmmmmmm. How are we going to pass them?

Tippi: Can’t you just flip?

Snifit 1: That’s for wusses.

Snifit 2: I heard a technique from my mother’s father’s sister’s grandson.

Snifit 1: What would that be?

Snifit 2: This.

Snifit 2 pulls out two cans of vegetables.

Tippi: -_-  What purpose will that serve?

Snifit 2: This.

Snifit 2 throws the canned vegetables and the Gnips eat them. The Gnips turn greener and pass out.

Snifit 1: Let’s go.

The Snifits and Tippi go into the next room and see Mimi.

Mimi: Hi. If you’re looking for Merlee, she’s upstairs to the right.

Snifit 1: Thanks, mysterious lady.

Tippi: I don’t know why, but something like this seems familiar.

The Snifits go where they were directed, and see a button.

Snifit 1: What’s this do?

Snifit 1 pushes it and the windows and doors are locked. The ceiling grows spikes and starts coming down. Snifit 1 flips and Snifit 2, panicking, blows up the wall with Boomer, making a hole which he goes through. The ceiling hits the floor and Snifit 1 jumps on it and gets the key.

Snifit 1: Hey Bro, you all right?

Snifit 2: Look what I found.

YOU GOT A WII REMOTE.

Snifit 1: Just like me. Let’s go.

The Snifits come back and see the Gnaw tied to the door. Snifit 2 throws another can of vegetables and Gnaw gets stunned for a moment and Snifit 1 unlocks the door. The Gnaw chases after Mimi but she flips and the Gnaw hits the wall, knocking itself out. The Snifits continue and hit the Star Block.

Chapter 2-3: The Big Bang.

Snifit 2: Merlee is not here. Where is she? Well, let’s go.

The Snifits walk ahead and Snifit 2 trips on a vase and breaks it.

Mimi: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!! HOW DARE YOU?!

Snifit 1: I’ll give you 1,000 coins.

Mimi: That vase was worth 2,000,000 rupees! So pay up!

Tippi: Um. He only has coins.

Mimi: Then you’ll be my slaves!!! Ciao.

Snifit 1: Now what?

Snifit 2: We hope and pray.

Tippi: I say we find info.

The Snifits walk around and see a jailer.

Jailer: If you pay me 1,000 rupees I’ll tell you a secret.

Snifit 1: How about I give you 10,000 rupees if you tell me everything now.

Jailer: Sure. There’s a safe up and-

Snifit 2: Sucker!

Snifit 2 POW Bills him into oblivion.

Tippi: Why?

Snifit 1: I’m not going to pay him! Now let’s go!

The Snifits jump the gap and see a chest and open it.

Slim: Hey, thanks. Now I’ll count to ten and then give you my power. Ooooooooooooooooooooooone Twooooooooooooooooooooo Threeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiix tweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeelve nine thousaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand five milliooooooooooooooooooooooooooooon oooooooooooooooooooooooooone point eight ten!

Snifit 2: And people say we’re bad at math.

Slim: Just for that, spin of doom tackle!

Slim starts spinning around and the Snifits run and head for the safe but see the electric barrier. Slim attacks but the Snifits duck and Slim hits the electricity and explodes.

Boomer: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! SLIM!

Snifit 1: Not to worry, Boomer. Now Slim has disabled the electricity. Let’s move on.

They go and see the safe.

Snifit 1: Your explosion won’t break it open. Hey Snifit 2, do you still have that backpack with you?

Snifit 2: Yeah. Why?

Snifit 1: What backpack was it?

Snifit 2: The Boom Pack…! Good idea!

Tippi: You had a Spicy Soup inside a backpack with a lot of explosives?

Snifit 1: We eat soup every time we make an explosive.

Tippi: -_-

Snifit 2: Now let’s get to work.

The Snifits put every explosive from the Mushroom Kingdom and other worlds such as TLoZ, Kirby, etc. next to the safe. Then they tie Boomer to the explosives. The Snifits go very far away from the explosives and light the fuse.

Boomer: ! WAIT GUYS! YOU DIDN’T LIGHT ME! Wait, I can light myself. That’s it, I will light myself and avoid de-

KA-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!

Snifit 1 looks and sees they blew up the top of the mansion, but the safe is still intact without a scratch.

Snifit 2: NOTHING AROUND HERE WORKS!!!

Snifit 2 kicks the safe door and it opens.

Snifit Group: -_-

You got 2,000,000 rupees.

The Snifits give it to Mimi.

Mimi: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Mimi blows up.

The Snifits get  a chainsaw and cut the bars and move on.

Chapter 2-4: That shape shifter is demented! Oh, and let’s have a faceoff!

Snifit 1: Hmmmmmm. Merlee must be in this basement.

????: Visitors, I see. You must come to meet me.

Snifits: !

They see Merlee but they can see through her.

Merlee: I am in trouble, you see. That girl defeated me. A-

Snifit 1: Stop talking in rhyme!

Merlee: Force of habit. If you find me be careful or-

Merlee disappears.

Tippi: Seems all too familiar.

Snifit 1: Let’s go.

The Snifits continue and, after going through 30 doors, they find Merlee.

Merlee: You found me. You wish to get the Pure Heart, see.

Snifit 1: I said to stop talking in rhyme!

Merlee: Sorry. You can have it for a price of 3,000,000 gold coins.

Snifit 2: @#$% NO!!!

Snifit 2 POW Bills Merlee and Merlee turns back into Mimi;

Mimi: THAT’S CHEATING!!!

Merlee: Good job, Snifits.

Mimi: I am the shape shifter known as Mimi! Now you will feel my wrath! TRUE MIMI COME FORTH!

Mimi cracks her neck and her head spins around many times. It finally stops and six spider legs come out her head.

Mimi: Mimimimimimimimimimimimimimimimimimimimi!!!

Merlee: She is invincible! Come find me! Huh?

She sees a trail of yellow leading to the door behind Mimi.

Snifit 1: RUN FASTER!

The Snifits are going from door to door. After 40 doors they see a Big Boo.

Big Boo: Once you look the other way, you’re dead.

The Snifits walk backwards and enter the door.

Big Boo: Well that wasn’t right. You stink!

The Snifits go in the girls’ bathroom and open a door but see something in the toilet.

Snifit 1: Ugh. Looks like something Booster would let out!

Merlee: It;s me!

Merlee pops out.

Snifit 2: And I thought Booster smelled!

Merlee: )=<

Snifit 2: Sorry.

Merlee: Well here-

Mimi appears and copies Merlee, but Snifit 1 POW Bills the right one and Mimi converts back.

Mimi: You meanies aren’t going to get away with this. It’s time for a showdown.

Snifit 1: Or a faceoff.

Mimi: Whatever!

Merlee leaves and starts singing her song.

Snifit 2 20/20
VS
Mimi ???/???

Mimi throws out some rupees but Snifit 2 dodges them with ease. Mimi does her rupee wave and Snifit 2 gets hit.

Snifit 2: Something tells me if we hadn’t killed two certain Pixls this battle would’ve been much easier.

Snifit 1: How did you know I killed Thoreou?

Snifit 2: Powers. I have them. OW!

Mimi hits Snifit 2 with another rupee wave. Snifit 2 uses Bolt but all it does is stun her. Snifit 2 shoots bullets but Mimi deflects them. Snifit 2 jumps on the bullets and then jumps on her twice but no legs come off.

Snifit 2: That is some serious- OW!

Snifit 2 gets hit by one of Mimi’s leg. Mimi corners Snifit 2.

Snifit 2: KEEP AWAY!

Snifit 2 presses - on his Wii Remote and a huge fan appears and blows Mimi away. He hits 1 and 2 on his Remote and gets out giant grass clippers and cuts one of Mimi’s legs off.

Mimi: OW! That’s it, I’m done being merciful. Time to die! Mimimimimimimimimimi.

Mimi uses her rupee wave but Snifit 2 presses A and a Buzzy Beetle shell covers Snifit 2 and protects him. Mimi uses Rupee Tornado and hits Snifit 2, who takes a lot of damage. Snifit 2 fights the pain and cuts another one of Mimi’s leg. Mimi hangs onto the ceiling and starts shooting out shadow webs, but Snifit 2 uses his fan to blow the webs away. Mimi shoots out a rupee and hits Snifit 2’s hand and he lets go off the Wii Remote. Mimi gets him in a shadow web and starts sapping his health away. Snifit 2 uses Drain to burn the shadow web. Snifit 2 drinks a Shroom Shake, +10 HP. Mimi pounces on Snifit 2 but he cuts off another leg.

Mimi: GAAAAAAAAAAH!!! NOW I’M MAD! Mimimimimimimimimimimimi.

Snifit 2 13/20
VS
Mimi ???/???

Mimi throws shadow webs all over the place and Snifit 2 is now slow and can’t even jump. Mimi gets on the ceiling and starts dropping rupee bombs and Snifit 2, having been outrun, starts getting hit. Snifit 2 pushes B on his remote and a whip comes out, which he grabs and throws at Mimi. Mimi falls down and he cuts off another leg. Mimi gets furious. She kicks Snifit 2 into the wall and he gets stuck there. Mimi starts shooting a lot of rupees at Snifit 2. Snifit 2 pushes A and the shell appears but Mimi uses her Rupee Tornado and hits Snifit 2. Snifit 2 uses his clipper to free himself and dodges the rupee bomb. Mimi gets on the ceiling again and starts throwing gears at Snifit 2. Snifit 2 drinks another Shroom Shake, +10 HP. Mimi starts throwing some toxins and Snifit 2 gets poisoned. Snifit 2 uses Bolt on Mimi and she gets stunned but doesn’t fall down. Snifit 2 uses his whip to grab her but the poison hurts him and he lets go. Mimi throws another Rupee Bomb at Snifit 2. Snifit 2 eats a Fried Shroom Plate, +15 HP. Mimi gets angry and throws some shadow string at Snifit 2, but he ducks and dodges it and then uses Drain to hit the web underneath Mimi. It burns off and Mimi falls down and Snifit 2 cuts another leg off. Mimi quickly hangs onto the ceiling and drops a rupee bomb in the toilet and it explodes, causing the place to almost fill with toilet water.

Snifit 2: This is so nasty! ACK!

Snifit 2 is hit with a Rupee Whirlpool and Snifit 2 uses Drain but Mimi dodges it and uses another Rupee Whirlpool. Snifit 2 gets an idea and smashes a window, letting some of the water out, but Mimi bombs another toilet and more water enters. Mimi uses some rupees to repair the window. Snifit 2 breaks the rupee window and quickly grabs Mimi’s last leg and throws her down. Snifit 2 uses Bolt on the water to stun her, then jumps up and cuts off her final leg.

Bsattle Over. +2500 EXP. Level Up.

Mimi: Urk. How… why… NO!

Mimi explodes and reverts back.

Mimi: This isn’t over.

Mimi flips and disappears.

Merlee: Thank you so much, Snifits.

Snifit 1: No prob, but why us?

Merlee: Back in the ancient times there were many helpers besides Shamans. I believe your ancestors were part of us.

Snifits: WHAT?! US?!

Merlee: You see, we needed everyone’s love and joy to power the Purity Heart. When the Purity Heart was finally done, everyone who helped got a little something. They got power and skill, which probably got gifted to you. Either way, there is something I read recently in the Light Prognosticus. “When the four heroes are nowhere to be found, five other heroes will come forth and defeat the dark one who holds the Chaos Heart.” You two are two of these heroes. You must find the others. Here, take the Pure Heart.

YOU GOT THE PURE HEART. END OF CHAPTER.

Back at Castle Dimentio.

Count Bleck: So this hero has defeated Mimi.

Nastasia: Yeah, Count, this hero will go to the Bitlands next.

Count Bleck: He has already defeated O’Chunks and Mimi, but he hasn’t defeated me. I will go.

Dimentio: NO! As your master, I instruct you not to fight these heroes…yet. I will go.

Count Bleck: !  A-are you sure?

Dimentio: This hero can’t possibly be a threat. I’ll obliterate him. Ciao, Bleck.

Dimentio teleports away.

Nastasia: I’d better crush the last of the resistance.

Somewhere in Castle Dimentio…

Bowser: I’ve been here before, and I still can’t find my way out!

Hammer Bro: Chill, King. You have some of us on your side.

Bowser: Well, let’s get moving.

Bowser starts wandering through the castle, not knowing he is going toward a dead end and Snifit 3.

Bowser: !  HEY! YOU’RE THAT SNIFIT WHO ATTACKED ME!!!

Snifit 3: Hi.

Koopatrol: Look! The resistance.

Bowser sees a huge army of his minions and other enemies found in the castle.

Bowser: What do we do?

Suddenly a huge box appears over Bowser and his minions. Snifit 3 quickly jumps into the box and gets teleported along with them.

Koopatrol: Drats! Ah well.

At the same time this was happening…

Grate Guy: Ooh. Huh?

Grate Guy wakes up and sees he is in a dark place with his brother.

Knife Guy: Where are we?

Grate Guy: I say we’d better get out of here fast.

Luigi: Hey Grate Guy, Knife Guy. Are you lost like I am?

Knife Guy: Yeah, but we’d better get moving.

The trio start to run very fast, but they get so lost they find themselves back where they started.

Luigi: This isn’t helping. Maybe if we-

Suddenly Luigi gets hit by something.

Luigi: HAIL DIMENTIO!

Grate Guy: Eep.

Nastasia appears with many minions.

Nastasia: There’s nowhere to run.

Knife Guy: But we can fight!

Nastasia: Hold these two fools.

The minions grab them.

Grate Guy and Knife Guy: Hey! Let go! Noooooooooooooooo! Somebody help us!

Nastasia activates her glasses…

And so the Snifits have gotten the third Pure Heart, but can they actually save all worlds? Do they really have the strength to get all the Pure Hearts? What will Dimentio do to them? Find out in the next part of Super Paper Snifit.

Read on!


 
Comments, suggestions, stories, or story ideas? Email me!
Go back to Lemmy's Fun Fiction.
Go back to my main page.